Michelle Williams has reflected on the ‘unnerving’ experience of landing her very first Oscar nomination.
The 42-year-old first came to fame as Jen Lindley in Dawson’s Creek at the age of 16, and has not left the spotlight since, appearing in All The Money In The World, Venom, Fosse/Verdon and many others in that time.
She has also landed a string of awards and a whopping five Academy Award nominations, for roles including Blue Valentine, Manchester By The Sea and, most recently, for the Fabelmans.
Speaking of her first Oscar nod at 25, for Alma Beers Del Mar in 2005 drama Brokeback Mountain alongside late husband Heath Ledger, Jake Gyllenhaal and Anne Hathaway, she explained that the attention was ‘destabilizing’ at that point in her career.
Appearing on the Sunday Sitdown with Willie Geist podcast, she told the host: ‘It was really unnerving after that. What do you do? What do you do next?
‘I never really had attention on me before in that way, and I think that that attention can be sort of destabilizing.
‘Now it feels like, “Well, people are watching. What if I make a mistake?” That’s really scary. What would happen to me?
‘I think I felt a little bit frozen for a moment, creatively, about where I would go next. I felt so free to try things before that. I didn’t think anybody was really paying attention or really cared that much, so there’s a lot of liberation in that.’
One of the Oscar-nominated roles that Michelle portrayed didn’t leave her with the best memories on set, as she recently revealed that her stint as Marilyn Monroe left her ‘crying’ every day.
During a Q&A session with Fabelmans screenwriter Tony Kushner at 92NY last month, she detailed what she went through to channel the late Hollywood icon in the 2012 flick, and how much it took out of her.
Discussing how she prepares for projects, the mom-of-three explained that she sees preparation as ‘scaffolding’ a character, which becomes more difficult when portraying someone who ‘really did walk’.
‘When I played Marilyn, it really took my head off my body because I just didn’t know what I was doing,’ she recalled.
‘It was so excruciating, because I had never had to learn how to break myself and then remake myself in somebody else’s form. I’ve lived however many years, at that point I was 30, I’d accumulated 30 years of habits and tendencies.
‘I had to rid myself those and it was so painful, and then remake myself in somebody’s image. There was a lot of really hard learning, I cried every day I left that set.
‘But at the end of it, I thought, “Okay, I know a few things and I would like to carry this forward.” It became easier the next time, and easier the next time.’
Williams had a completely different experience while taking on the role of the Fabelman matriarch, as she admitted that she actually found it tough to walk away from the project when filming wrapped.
‘I had a really hard time leaving this movie,’ she added. ‘I was messed up. I was just like, I love this woman, I love these people. I cried so hard when we wrapped our last scene that Tony came up to me and said, “What happened?!”
‘I was so affected by it. I just couldn’t really shake it, honestly. And I still feel very emotional when I see you [Tony], when I see Steven [Spielberg]…
‘I just feel drawn to that time when we shared that space.’
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