If you’re in lockdown with your other half, you might have thought it was going to be the perfect opportunity to get it on.
You’re probably both working from home, you don’t have any social plans, you’re likely not as tired as you normally are during the week – so sex should be on the cards all the time, right?
Well that’s not actually what’s happening. New research by OnBuy has found that almost half of couples isolating together report that they are having less sex since lockdown began.
And it’s not just the frequency of the sex that’s a problem, it’s also the quality. 41% of women are unhappy with their sex life – three in five believe it needs spicing up.
In the survey, women said the biggest reason for disappointing sex is not enough time spent on foreplay – which really is inexcusable at a time like this. If nothing else, we all have loads of time.
So, what could be behind are faltering sex lives? Maybe it’s the constant, creeping dread of living through a global pandemic? Despite what the movies may have you believe, living through what feels like the end of days is more stressful than sexy.
And, actually, a lot of us are quite tired – despite not doing much. Turns out that a lack of routine and structure coupled with high levels of stress and anxiety can mess with our sleep rhythms and leave us feeling exhausted.
But, experts have suggested that sex could be quite important right now. It can help to bring you closer to your partner and make your relationship more solid. It can also be a much-needed stress reliever, and a much more enjoyable way to stay active than going for a jog.
The researchers, who surveyed 1,360 18-45-year-olds, found that 81% of men believe that they could get better sex elsewhere, compared to 78% of women.
Despite this, only 21% of men and 17% of women have brought up issues about their partner’s bedroom skills. So clearly, this is not an easy thing to talk about.
Spice up your sex life using an app
A notable finding from the survey was that 82% believe a sex app could help their relationship. So we’ve collated some of the best apps you can download to help spice things up.
XTracker – This allows users to create a sex calendar of when, and how they’re having sex. The app features include monthly statistics, the variety of positions, number of toys and whether or not protection was used.
Sex Tracker by Nice – You can keep track of your sexual activities, partners, STDs, STIs, tests, locations, orgasms and the duration of each session.
Users can view their sex statistics which include daily, weekly and monthly averages, longest, shortest and average duration, favourite activity and favourite time of the week to get it on.
Sex Keeper: Tracker and Positions – Users will have a personal diary with a calorie counter as it connects with Apple Health.
This app counts the duration, heartbeat, frequency of sex positions and the number and quality of orgasms. The app also stores images… if you’re into that kind of thing.
Kindu for Couples – This app allows you to improve the intimacy of your relationship by learning new things to do with your partner, and discovering more about their desires.
The app is a place to discuss your wants and wishes and it even provides personalised tips.
Couple Games Relationship Quiz – Users can create hundreds of questions to quiz their partner, where they are also able to use the chat feature.
Along with this, answers/guesses are stored in the app memory, so they are available to look back on.
Ferly – This app provides sensual stories to spark your imagination, community polls, a personal journal, guided sexual practices, and a personal profile to track your progress.
Regain Couples Therapy – Users can get support on their relationship from licensed therapists who are highly experienced in providing relationship therapy.
Honi Game for Couples – This app provides thousands of dares to surprise your partner with.
You answer questions to discover how much you know about each other, discovering new fantasies, new Kamasutra positions, funny ‘would you rather’ questions and get daily tips on how to improve your relationship.
The benefits of using an app means you don’t have to order anything bulky or awkward online, and you can start using it pretty instantly.
However, sex isn’t everything. If you or your partner aren’t in a sexy mood right now, that’s OK – and very understandable. Talk to each other as a first port of call, the best sex always stems from quality communication.
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