My fiancé bought me a cheap engagement ring but he can afford more

My fiancé bought me a cheap engagement ring even though I know he can afford more – should I feel disappointed?

  • A woman said she was disappointed when her fiancé proposed with a cheap ring
  • She wrote on Mumsnet that the ring was made from sterling silver cubic zirconia
  • Despite low expectations, she said her ‘immediate feeling was disappointment’
  • Many said the gesture ‘doesn’t bode well’ while some said he was ‘clueless’
  • Read more: Parents on Mumsnet share ‘ugly and pretentious’ baby names

A woman has been left feeling disappointed after her fiancé proposed with a cheap engagement ring – even though he spends extravagantly on himself.

The anonymous woman took to British parenting forum Mumsnet to explain that the ring ‘looked cheap like costume jewellery’, and she couldn’t help but feel let down. 

She admitted she doesn’t often wear jewellery and her expectations were low, but she was still dismayed when she found out the ring was made from sterling silver and cubic zirconia, whch she described as ‘basically cheap’. 

Online users flooded the comments saying that the gesture ‘doesn’t bode well’ while some have said he may just be ‘clueless’.

An anonymous woman took to parenting forum Mumsnet to explain that she was disappointed with her ‘cheap’ engagement ring (stock image)

The woman explained: ‘So recently engaged…well 2 months or so…I hate to admit but when I saw the ring my immediate feeling was disappointment. It looked cheap like costume jewellery and not what I expected. 

‘I’m not a jewellery wearer in general so my expectations about a ring were low. I tried the ring on and it was a bit big. He said he would get it resized for me.. so 2 months has gone past and no mention of the ring or fixing it. 

‘Out of curiosity today I researched the hallmark on the ring. It says sterling silver cubic zirconia. Basically cheap…

‘I know an engagement is not about money but I know he can afford so much more and is extravagant in his own spending on himself…

 She admitted that her expectations were low but said she was upset when she knew her fiancé ‘can afford so much more’

The woman later added that she spoke to her fiancé but he was ‘very defensive’ and described her as ‘ungrateful’

‘Am I entitled to feel disappointed or should the ring price matter?’

She later added that she spoke to her husband-to-be about the ring but he simply labelled her ‘ungrateful’.

‘I’m not materialistic at all but I feel an engagement ring is something that should be special in some way…I’ve seen rings similar on Amazon for 20 quid,’ she wrote. 

People rushed to the comments to tell her that she had a right to feel disappointed and that the cheap purchase was revealing of his personality.  

 

Online users flooded the comments with messages of support telling her to tell her she had a right to feel disappointed

One said: ‘If it was all he could afford it wouldn’t bother me.

‘But if he can afford more, and spends more on himself normally, then I would be worried it was part of a pattern of behaviour where he thinks he deserves more financially than you.’

Another wrote: ‘This to me shows that he feels that he deserves nice things, yet you don’t, which really doesn’t bode well.’

One said: ‘Cripes, cubic zirconia and sterling silver? maybe this is the sign of things to come? Tight with money, tight with love.’

While another Mumsnetter simply wrote: ‘This ring isn’t a lifetime promise.’ 

Another acknowledged that some couples are trying to save money but the ring was still not enough, saying: ‘If you were on a tight budget and had discussed keeping the cost down that would’ve been really sensible.

‘However this seems like he’s being tight.’ 

Others said that the price of an engagement ring is not what matters and that her fiancé could simply be ‘clueless’

Meanwhile, some people said that the price should not matter when getting engaged, with one writing: ‘An engagement ring is a symbol, nothing more.

‘My wife would have killed me if hers cost more than a few hundred pounds and for people to spend thousands (as with a wedding) on something like this is obviously your choice, but in my opinion, crazy.

‘The fact that you “needed” to look at the price says that maybe you value the financial security rather than the love of the man himself.’ 

Another comment suggested the poster’s fiancé was simply unaware of the ring’s significance, writing: ‘Without much context, it’s possible he’s just clueless about engagement rings and then got his feelings hurt when informed he did poorly.’

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