DEAR DEIDRE: A COLLEAGUE constantly badgered me to have sex with him even though I’m happy in a new relationship.
He wouldn’t take “no” for an answer. I made it clear I wasn’t interested so he begged me to let him send a video of himself masturbating.
I kept refusing but he kept pushing. I think he even said he’d stop it all if I let him send it.
I felt so pressured, I stopped saying “no” but didn’t say “yes” either.
He sent the video, which made me feel violated.
Since then he has stopped asking me for sex and we agreed to be friends.
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I’m 28 and my boyfriend is 29. My colleague is 30.
My boyfriend has noticed something is wrong and has been asking questions. I don’t know what to do.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Your colleague has cyber-flashed you – sent you unwanted images of his genitals – which understandably has left you feeling unsafe.
Just like flashing in real life, sending unwanted pics or videos online is also a form of indecent exposure.
I realise you may not want to complain but you haven’t doneanything wrong.
Keep the videos and photos as evidence. Sharing your feelings will help ease the pressure.
You can talk to Rape Crisis (0808 500 2222, rapecrisis.org.uk) who will listen and support you.
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