How many times have we heard it before, ladies? It’s not that men don’t want to help out more around the house or take a more active role in child care — it’s just that women are naturally so much better suited for it. They’re not slacking off, you see; they’re just delegating to our expertise. To which I say: Hah! Women become experts in bed-making and diaper-changing not from an innate, biological passion that burns from within, but from necessity, just as men would if saddled with the same tasks. And so when Blake Shelton jokes that he’s not participating in the wedding planning for his and Gwen Stefani’s upcoming nuptials because he’d just do such a terrible job if he did try, my hackles go way up.
In a new USA Today interview, Shelton opened up about how far along the planning is since he proposed to Stefani in October 2020, cracking jokes about his own “classless” taste and indicating he’d leave the serious decision-making in his fiancée’s hands.
“It would be a pretty classless wedding if I was in control of any decisions, especially to do with food — if I was picking our meal, it would just literally be everything fried. French fries, chicken tenders, you know, all of that stuff,” he said.
She’s in the middle of planning the thing and she’s always so mindful, [asking] ‘what do you think about this or that?’” he added. “I know she’s having a blast doing it.”
Look, Gwen Stefani is hardly on house arrest here and I’m sure she is having a blast planning a huge fancy celeb wedding to her partner of five years and trying to figure out how many outfit changes before the reception crosses a line. But if my future fiancé told me he couldn’t help plan our wedding because he can’t imagine meaningfully participating in a menu selection beyond making it look like a Happy Meal? We’d be having a conversation far beyond the details of a wedding.
Then again, Shelton isn’t just any old man: he’s a celebrity man, and I do have to allow for the extent to which famous people become used to their decisions being made for them.
“I never pick my own clothes unless I’m doing one of these FaceTime calls with you and I put on a cap and shirt,” he told USA Today. “But [Stefani] picks my clothes for things like … something formal with the family. I never even pick my clothes for The Voice. I have a girl that does that for me. So, nobody lets me pick clothes. That’s not a Gwen wedding thing. That’s just in general.”
Shelton may be a little bit helpless in certain categories, but I’m confident Stefani can awaken his interest in fashion or event planning if it’s important to her. Right now, she’s enjoying dressing him up like a life-size, Oklahoma-edition Ken doll and if Gwen Stefani is happy, I am too.
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