My bridesmaid is too fat for her dress after piling on weight – I’ve refused to buy a new one & she says I’m shaming her

A BRIDE-TO-BE has admitted to telling one of her bridesmaids to lose weight for her wedding as she refuses to buy her another dress.

Taking to Reddit, she explained that she had bought her bridesmaids' dresses for her big day back in 2019, but because of the pandemic, her wedding was postponed.

Since then, one of her bridesmaids she calls 'Jane' had put on a significant amount of weight and could no longer fit in the dress she bought.

The anonymous woman explained that Jane had been on a fitness journey since 2021, but still couldn't fit in the dress and returned it to the bride.

She explained "Since it'd been 2 years since purchasing the dress, it obviously couldn't be returned.

"She gave it back since, but the value had significantly decreased, especially since the dress was now discounted by the store itself."

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The bride said she had chosen different styles of dress to suit each bridesmaid, and said she was happy to sell the dress and contribute the money for Jane to buy a new dress.

She explained she couldn't afford to buy a new dress for Jane and was happy for Jane to buy something less expensive so long as it fit the theme.

But Jane wasn't happy with this compromise the bride proposed.

The bride recalls: "She said I was being an awful friend and shaming her for her weight.

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"She said she couldn't afford a new dress and said I had to pay for her dress or she couldn't be at my wedding."

The woman continued: "I told her I couldn't pay more than I was offering for a new dress, and I understood that she couldn't be a bridesmaid and I hoped she'd be able to make it to the wedding as a guest.

"I tried wrapping it up but she wouldn't leave.

"She teared up and called me cheap for not paying for a bridesmaid dress since I'd paid for everyone else's, and that if I really wanted 'my friend' there I'd actually make an effort and brought up how much we were spending for our wedding and how 'an extra small purchase would be nothing'."

Doubling down, she told Jane to either buy a new dress, find a way to fit into the old one or not come at all.

Jane had told the rest of the wedding party that the bride told her to lose weight or be kicked out of the bridal party.

She said the rest of the party was now pressuring her to buy a new dress for Jane so everyone could 'move on and get over it.'

Now the bride is questioning her stance and asked Reddit users whether she was just being stubborn or having a backbone.

Many users agreed that the bride-to-be shouldn't buy a new dress as she had offered Jane many compromises.

One wrote: "Most brides don’t even buy the dress to begin with. Op isn’t just leaving her to buy a full new dress op offered to give her the money from selling the dress to buy a new one."

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"She can't take responsibility for her own actions. You bought her a dress and were going to give her the returned amount to buy a new dress – therefore you are STILL buying her new dress." Another agreed.

A third commented: "I’ve been in many bridal parties and have never had my dress purchased for me before. That you already purchased the dress and offered to subsidize a new one is above and beyond."

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