DEAR DEIDRE: I MADE a massive mistake. I cheated on my boyfriend and now I’m pregnant, and I can’t be certain who the father is.
I am 28 and my boyfriend is 29. We have been together for six years and have a great relationship.
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I’m 20 weeks pregnant with our first baby but I’m worried it’s not my boyfriend’s.
I went on holiday to Cyprus with a group of girls in the summer.
It was a hen party but only a few of us went due to the coronavirus restrictions.
One night we went to a bar and I met the most gorgeous guy. He was 27 and we ended up chatting the whole night.
He was staying at the same hotel as us and persuaded me to go to his hotel room for another drink.
I waited until my mate was asleep and crept out to his room.
I know it was a stupid thing to do with the virus around, but I had been drinking.
I tapped on the door and the next thing I knew I felt two hands on my body.
We were kissing passionately and we had the most amazing sex.
I thought he had pulled out in time but I now realise that it was one big mistake because I had a positive pregnancy test a couple of weeks after we returned. I can’t be certain who the father is.
I am so worried my boyfriend knows something is wrong. I love him very much and I don’t want to hurt him.
I know he’s going to be an excellent dad and there’s no way I’d terminate now.
What are the chances of it being the guy on holiday’s baby? We didn’t swap any contact details.
Do I tell my boyfriend what I did or just let him think the baby is his?
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JUST about all of us have sexual fantasies but men and women often mean different things by the word and it can cause conflict.
My Sex Fantasies e-leaflet can help.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Guilt can make us assume the worst and many people do not really understand the way pregnancies are dated.
Make an appointment as soon as you can to see your doctor or the practice midwife.
Take along a note of the dates involved, when you had sex with your boyfriend and this other guy.
Hopefully you will discover the actual date of conception does not coincide with your holiday fling and you can stop worrying.
If it looks as though the baby does result from your one-night stand, best be honest with your boyfriend as secrets have a habit of causing more problems in the long run.
Let’s hope your relationship is strong enough to survive.
Some guys can cope, especially once they’ve met the baby, so ask him not to rush any decision.
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