It's been three months since my girlfriend and I split up but I can’t move on

DEAR DEIDRE: IT has been three months since my girlfriend and I split up but I can’t move on.

We always had a messy relationship and it ended after a massive row about her drinking – she likes a bottle of wine every night.

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I moved back to my parents’ house and she stopped speaking to me.

She is a nurse. I felt so angry that I phoned her boss and lied that she had been drinking on duty – which led to her suspension from work.

Then I felt guilty and told her what I had done. Now our relationship is even worse. I keep leaving messages but she ignores them all. She finally sent me one saying: “Please stop!” 

I’m 25, she’s 24, and I think we’re both toxic people and bad for each other. But she won’t accept any responsibility for our break-up. I can’t cope any more.

He’s never brought up marriage or kids, and if I do he shuts it down quickly, saying he’s not ready yet.

DEIDRE SAYS: Hard as this must be, your behaviour is becoming obsessive, and it’s not healthy for either of you.

It’s clear your ex wants to move on, and you owe it to yourself to move on too.

If you are feeling low, please speak with CALM – Campaign Against Living Miserably (, 0800 58 58 58).

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