DEAR DEIDRE: I WATCHED my girlfriend kissing our neighbour at a party. There was footage of them recorded on my security camera that I looked at a few days later.
I was so shocked as I thought we were happy together. I am 46 and my girlfriend is 42. We have been together for 15 years.
When I confronted her she became angry and denied it – until I showed her the video. She just made excuses, claiming that she was drunk and that our neighbour was the one who initiated it.
In fact, she blamed me for leaving the party early as I felt unwell, leaving her with our neighbour.
Our relationship was great before all this but now my girlfriend says she wants to leave me. She is putting all the guilt on me for what happened that night. It’s killing me.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Your girlfriend knows she behaved badly but is putting the blame on you to deflect attention away from herself.
If you want to try to save your relationship, don’t get into a blame game. Drunkenness may be a partial explanation, but it never excuses cheating.
If you love her then at least try to sort this out before giving up on your relationship.
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