‘My fella told me he was secretly bi and into drag – now I borrow his clothes’

A lot has changed since Abigoliah Schamaun met her boyfriend Tom Watts eight years ago.

Like many modern day romances, their relationship started with a Tinder match.

And remembering their first date, the 36-year-old said: “Tom wore a suit, he’s always liked to dress up.”

READ MORE: Wife comes out as bisexual to hubby – but stays married to him while she dates women

But until recently she had no idea of the extent to which he actually enjoys experimenting with outfits.

That’s because Tom, who is from Cornwall, found the courage to tell his partner that he was bisexual and into drag racing after he suffered personal tragedy.

Abigoliah, who is originally from the US, was completely accepting and the pair are now stronger than ever.

And speaking exclusively with the Daily Star, Abigoliah said: “I alway had had a suspicion that Tom was bisexual. But he firmly maintained he was straight and I chose not to push it.

“So when he eventually told me I told him I wasn’t the least bit surprised and that I love and support him 100%.

“One of the benefits is that Tom has a famous wardrobe and I get to borrow his clothes. He has a very small waist, so sometimes he tells me off for stretching out the tighter outfits.

“We both like to dress up, express ourselves and be fun.

“We’ve been through so much together and I’m glad he can be his authentic self and I’m really proud of him.”

Tom, who also came out as non-binary while still using the he/him pronouns, works as a cinematographer in London where he lives with his girlfriend.

But in 2020 Tom started to understand who he really was after tragically losing both his parents.

His mum was diagnosed with cancer and abruptly died the evening lockdown was announced.

Sadly, his dad was also diagnosed shortly after and he passed away six months to the day of his mum’s death.

Heartbroken, the 36-year-old remembered: “I was close to both of my parents and after both of them died so close together my world collapsed.

“It was after my dad died that I was diagnosed as autistic. It was really difficult because my parents will never know.

“During this time of breakdown and peeling back all the layers I started to understand who I actually was and this was when I came out as bi.”

Tom added: “One of the hardest parts I struggle to deal with is that I had decided to come out to my mum the next time I saw her but I never got the chance because she died so suddenly.

“I know she would have been completely accepting of it, she was an artist and always supportive of the queer community but I just couldn’t get past the mental hurdle of coming out until it was too late.”

Abigoliah is a bisexual herself and she works as a stand-up comedian.

She is currently at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival until August 28 with her Legally Cheeky show at Just The Tonic.

And it was while she was away touring that Tom started to dress up in secret.

He said: “I started to experiment with femme clothing while Abigoliah was away.

“When I felt comfortable that I could make an outfit look good and not just look like a confused guy in a badly fitting dress, I plucked up all my courage, sat her down and timidly told her.

“She was just like ‘yeah obviously’ and it was the same when I told her I was bi, it was no surprise.”

Tom then told his friends with an announcement post on Facebook.

And he hopes he can now help other people to be comfortable being their true selves.

He said: “The idea behind it was to help people feel more comfortable with coming out. From private messages I’ve received from people I think it’s worked to a degree.”


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